If he chooses to go back I don't think that makes your decision to move here 'wrong'. It just may be what is right for him in that moment. And that may change over time too maybe he'll return to Europe at some point, quien sabe no?
¡Claro! I was just thinking about my study abroad experience in college. It took me 35 years to get back to Europe and it was the perfect time to do it. So just feeling philosophical about the twists and turns life can take.
As the kid in this equation, I resented not having a choice when I was relocated. But I’ve leaned into the fact that my life has been richer for all the things I’ve been exposed to. And that, in my heart, I’ll never have to choose, only to be present to both cultures as I spend time in them. (I long ago worked it all through with my parents.)
I really appreciate this perspective. Thank you for commenting, Rachel. ❤️ I know my son in particular has had a hard time with it, but I’m hoping that as an adult he can see what we were trying to give him. I do understand how he may feel, though, given that he didn’t have a choice.
I’ve asked all of these questions nearly everyday! It’s so hard to know if our choices are the right ones. My teenager speaks often of returning to the US. We’ve been in Portugal for two years. Selfishly, I was hoping by now she’d set her sights on European universities but she still misses the US and is excited to return. I want her to choose her path and maybe our move hasn’t made sense to her. We’ve got a couple of years and who knows what will happen. But it’s so hard!
Yes! I want my kids close, but I understand they have to blaze their own paths. Part of me fully expects my son will return to the U.S. if not for university but for a job. He’s very driven, and I can see him wanting to take full advantage of the U.S. economy that way.
I think it can be hard to predict exactly where life will take any of us, no matter what kind of plans we try to make. But I think by modeling the willingness to move and adapt you will have prepared your kids to be adaptable and take chances of their own. And staying in one place wouldn’t guarantee that they wouldn’t still want to stretch their wings and move away anyway.
If he chooses to go back I don't think that makes your decision to move here 'wrong'. It just may be what is right for him in that moment. And that may change over time too maybe he'll return to Europe at some point, quien sabe no?
Sí, pero mi corazón de mamá estará muy triste. 💔
¡Claro! I was just thinking about my study abroad experience in college. It took me 35 years to get back to Europe and it was the perfect time to do it. So just feeling philosophical about the twists and turns life can take.
As the kid in this equation, I resented not having a choice when I was relocated. But I’ve leaned into the fact that my life has been richer for all the things I’ve been exposed to. And that, in my heart, I’ll never have to choose, only to be present to both cultures as I spend time in them. (I long ago worked it all through with my parents.)
I really appreciate this perspective. Thank you for commenting, Rachel. ❤️ I know my son in particular has had a hard time with it, but I’m hoping that as an adult he can see what we were trying to give him. I do understand how he may feel, though, given that he didn’t have a choice.
I’ve asked all of these questions nearly everyday! It’s so hard to know if our choices are the right ones. My teenager speaks often of returning to the US. We’ve been in Portugal for two years. Selfishly, I was hoping by now she’d set her sights on European universities but she still misses the US and is excited to return. I want her to choose her path and maybe our move hasn’t made sense to her. We’ve got a couple of years and who knows what will happen. But it’s so hard!
Yes! I want my kids close, but I understand they have to blaze their own paths. Part of me fully expects my son will return to the U.S. if not for university but for a job. He’s very driven, and I can see him wanting to take full advantage of the U.S. economy that way.
I think it can be hard to predict exactly where life will take any of us, no matter what kind of plans we try to make. But I think by modeling the willingness to move and adapt you will have prepared your kids to be adaptable and take chances of their own. And staying in one place wouldn’t guarantee that they wouldn’t still want to stretch their wings and move away anyway.