The question, “Was it worth it?” comes up a lot in conversations with new friends about moving to Spain.
Honestly?
Don’t ask me when I’m frustrated with yet another piece of bureaucracy I have to untangle or when it’s summer, and everyone in my house is home and on top of one another 24/7.
Because we sold nearly everything we owned, we’re a bit of a curiosity. Yes, we stored some things for a while, but ultimately, most of it was sold. The remaining items traveled back to Spain with us for safekeeping.
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Most U.S. families have a lot of stuff. It’s a reality that comes with living in larger homes with attached garages, sometimes detached garages, and—especially in rural areas—land. Maybe you don’t mean to accumulate as much as you do, but over time, before you know it, you have a house full of stuff. Nothing made that more apparent than clearing out my mom’s house after she died or our own home before our move.
My mom kept everything: old catalogues, every report card my siblings and I ever received, clothing from her teaching days, her grandparents’ glasses … This list could go on forever. Sorting that all out piece by piece was sheer torture.
Our homes are our castles.
Will and I dug so deeply into this process that I sold houseplants. Pyrex storage containers. Gave away beloved books. Donated holiday decor. Sold tools.
In a way, it was easy. I wanted to move to Spain so much that I barreled ahead, not really stopping to think about what I was doing. All I could think about was my why. I never grieved the loss of most of our belongings.
A suburban life also often leads to a bit of keeping up with the Joneses, whether it’s what you want or not.
“Did you see Chelsea’s new car? I love that.”
“James got one of those robot mowers. Did you see it?”
“They’re putting in an In-N-Out, and I heard the neighbors at the pool say it was great. Should we go?”
You get the idea.
It’s low-grade competition. Before you know it, you could be thousands of dollars in debt and resenting your new car payment every month. But hey, you have a great car that fits in with your neighbors!
It felt freeing to break free from the shackles of that life—a life that demanded much from us but offered little in return except the stress of maintaining it.
The problem is you often can’t completely escape this ingrained instinct.
I still feel these little pangs of envy sometimes. A good example in my case is travel. I’ve done my fair share, visiting several countries, living abroad now, and exploring all kinds of places in Spain. As a family, we take two or three trips a year—often to brand new places for all of us. And still, when someone pops up in my Facebook or Instagram feed with a vacation that wasn’t on my radar but should be, there it is. That little twinge of, “I wish I was there.”
The restlessness still bubbles beneath the surface—just less prominently.
This couple asked the same question we're asking. Was it worth it? Their answer has a different perspective than mine, but the conversation winds up in almost exactly the same place.
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Ha ha the storage unit! 10 x 5 I wish. We sold our house and left in November for what was going to be one year in Spain and now we have decided to stay. We return to Chicago in August for a visit and the storage unit looms large!! We have had one off and on since downsizing in 2023. Ours is 20 x 10! I would like to ship a few pieces of furniture and some boxes that contain my pottery collection and my son’s mementos. I haven’t started the research on it but know that it would not be a practical decision but an emotional one. I cannot fathom getting rid of absolutely everything but know that we could stand to get rid of a lot! When I asked AI the costs to ship a studio or one bedroom worth of boxes and furniture I’m not sure I believed the price as it seemed too low. If you have any tips for how to find a reputable company let me know. There aren’t many Americans in Mallorca so most people I know haven’t shipped anything that far.
Jen, this is so funny cuz you are the 2nd neighbour to write about their mom being a hoarder! (I'm actually envious -- my mom kept very little and I wish I had more mementos). Seems you and Michelle Lester have that in common.
And yes it's so true -- you can sell the houseplants, the Pyrex, the books, the whole life, and still find the restlessness waiting for you on the other side. That feels so true to life abroad. Thank you for bringing this to the Home Abroad housewarming — it's just the kind of conversation I hoped would spill out into the neighbourhood.