Have you ever thought about what your life might look like if you’d made just one different decision?
Lots of books and shows explore this idea. A novel I read a few years ago, The Midnight Library by Matt Haig, is one I still think about. Every book on the shelf opens a door to an alternate life, offering a window into countless potential futures for the protagonist.
Then there’s Friends, a show everyone knows and my go-to comfort watch.
In Season 6, episodes 15 and 16 are called “The One That Could Have Been, Parts 1 & 2.” Phoebe is a stockbroker, Rachel married Barry, Ross and Carol are still married, Joey is still on Days of Our Lives, Chandler is a writer, and Monica struggles with her weight in adulthood.
All of these were potential futures—but not where they actually ended up.
It’s comedy gold, but there’s also a quiet lesson underneath the surface.
Ultimately, all the paths you could choose would likely lead to a similar outcome in life because, no matter what path you choose, you are still you.
When I think about my own path, living abroad was always in the cards. I couldn’t do it as a kid, study abroad was too expensive, and then I had a job, a family, and a whole life built in the Nashville suburbs.
Retirement, then?
In 2023, something shifted, and life offered a fork in the road. One fork led to a life abroad in retirement, full of travel and fun but with potentially questionable health. The other fork was a life abroad now, but it would mean deep sacrifices like selling nearly all of my family’s belongings, leaving the house we’d worked so hard for behind, and building a life in a new language and country.
Either path would’ve worked. Ultimately, they arrived at a similar place, just at different points in life.
Without waxing too philosophical, we’re all on the path we’re meant to be on, but one decision can change the trajectory entirely.
I’d love to know: was there a fork in the road for you that still sticks with you?
I write here about building a life abroad—slowly, imperfectly, and with a lot of trial and error.
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If you’d like to reach out directly, you can find me at jen@jeninspain.com.
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